Wednesday, 30 April 2008

Name that Movie

Okay boys and girls, lets get interactive. Below is a list of famous movie quotes. Can you name which film they are from? Answers will be published in my next post (or the next time i'm stuck for an update. Taha).

1 "Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.”
2 "Here’s Lookin’ at you, kid”
3 " I’ll be back.”
4“I have a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore”
5 “Play it again, Sam”
6 "Say hello to my little friend.”
7 “May the Force be with you.”
8 “I’m mad as hell and not gonna take it anymore.”
9 “But this goes to 11.”
10 “I see dead people.”
11 “Go ahead, make my day.”
12 “You can’t handle the truth.”
13 “There’s no place like home.” .
14 “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’ll get.”
15 “I’ll get you my pretty, and your little dog too.”
16 “Yo, Adrian”
17 “They’re Here!”
18 “Fasten your seatbelts. It’s going to be a bumpy night.”
19 “Stella….hey Stella.”
20 “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”
21 “The stuff that dreams are made of.”
22 “We don’t need no stinkin’ badges.”
23 “Bond, James Bond.”
24 “I’ll make him an offer he can’t resfuse.”
25 “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.”
26 “Rosebud”
27 “You’re gonna need a bigger boat.”
28 “I coulda been a contender.”
29 “Show me the money!”
30 “If you build it, he will come.”
31 “you’ve got to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?”
32 “Today, I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth.”
33 “The first rule of Fight Club is - you do not talk about Fight Club. The second rule of Fight Club is - you DO NOT talk about Fight Club.”
34 “Mrs. Robinson, you’re trying to seduce me. Aren’t you?”
35 “You know how to whistle, don’t you, Steve? You just put your lips together and blow.”
36 “I wish I knew how to quit you. ”
37 “All right, Mr. DeMille, I’m ready for my close-up.”
38 “Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.”
39 “What we’ve got here is failure to communicate.”
40 “E.T. Phone Home.”
41 A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.”
42 “After all, tomorrow is another day.”
43 “I’ll have what she’s having.”
44 “Plastics.”
45 “Attica! Attica!”
46 “Houston, we have a problem”
47 “You had me at hello.”
48 “There’s no crying in baseball.”
49 “Greed, for lack of a better word, is good.”
50 “Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.”
51 “Elementary, my dear Watson.”
52 “Here’s Johnny!”
53 “You aint heard nothin’ yet!”
54 “A boy’s best friend is his mother.”
55 “No wire hangers!!!”
56 “I have always depended on the kindness of strangers.”
57 “Hasta la vista, baby.”
58 “I am serious. And don’t call me Shirley.”
59 “Win just one for the Gipper.”
60 “My name is Indigo Montoya. You have killed my father. Prepare to die.”
61 “They call me Mr. Tibbs.”
62 “I’m walking here. I’m walking here.”
63 “Nobody puts Baby in a corner.”
64 “Well, here’s another nice mess you’ve gotten me into!”
65 “I’m king of the world”
66 “We rob banks.”
67 “Nobody’s perfect.”
68 “One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I don’t know.”
69 “As God is my witness, I’ll never be hungry again.” .
70 “Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here! This is the War Room!”
71 “Get busy livin’ or get busy dyin’”
72 “Fuggedaboutit”
73 “Can I borrow your underpants for ten minutes?”
74 “..But I’m funny how? I mean, funny like I’m a clown? I amuse you? I make you laugh?”
75 “You complete me.”

Thursday, 17 April 2008

Ghetto Blues

I used to live in a really rough neighbourhood. I ended up there because i was desperate to move out of my mother's house (not for any bad reason, i was just ready to spread my wings), but wary of flat-sharing. The flat in this neighbourhood became available very suddenly and i had to act quickly. It was a one bedroom flat, and i figured that it wouldn't be so bad, as i'd come home each night, shut the door behind me and i'd be safe and sound in my nice, clean dwellings.

Dave Chappelle, the comedian, does a high-larious skit about his first trip into the 'hood in DC, where he encountered a crack-dealing baby. He could just as easily been describing this area of London that i lived in, though i never came across any crack dealers myself. The bit i'm referring to starts around the 4:56min mark or 7:00 to go straight to the baby part. (Warning: The language is 'fruity')

So i moved in and nothing untoward happened for quite awhile. I'm not saying things weren't going on all around me, as each morning, i'd walk to the bus stop only to behold yet another yellow police notice asking for witnesses to come forward for burgularies, assault, murder, you name it! Actually, in the first year, the only dodgy thing that did happen was that i once had a knock on the door. I wasn't expecting anyone so i spoke through the door asking who it was. A man replied that he was from the flat below and there's a leak in the ceiling which might have originated from my flat. I said it wasn't from here and he eventually left. So far, so good. The only problem with that story was that i was on the first floor and all the ground floor was either offices or the Tenant's Hall. There had also been a spate of burgularies whereby the thugs had gained access to people's homes by pretending to be on legitimate business.

Something noteworthy did happen eventually. I think i must have been there for a year or so. It was a Sunday morning and being in the choir, i had to be in church an hour before the service began. I was running late, and had just managed to gulp down some of my obligatory morning cup of tea, dump the mug in the sink, open the front door and step out, only to almost stumble over a Somali-looking man lying prone about 3 feet away from my door with a pool of blood around his head.

Once my heart had returned to as close to it's normal rhythm it was going to get, i gingerly inched towards the body because tragically, that's what it was. He was dead, his eyes wide open and glazed over. I whipped out my phone and was about to dial 999, when it occurred to me that i didn't want the police having my number. I locked my door, determined to call from a phone booth along the way to the bus stop, but somehow somehow, i found myself on the bus towards the tube station and that was that!

When i got back home that evening the body had gone and there was police tape around the place, so i guess someone else had discharged thier duty as a good citizen. Till this day, i'm not sure how i managed to literally step over the body of a dead man (okay, i exagerrate) and go about my business. I guess i feared the wrath of my choir master more than i felt any civil responsibility. I figured he was dead and there was nothing that was going to change that. I know that makes me sound like a cold-hearted witch, but i'm not. What would you have done?

So, life continued. Towards the end of my second year in the place though, things took a turn for the worse. On this particular day, i'd been on study leave and at college. I got home to find my kitchen window shattered and the front door, wide open. I gingerly made my way inside and it became obvious that i'd been burgled (durrr!). They had taken my work laptop, which i had brought home with me the previous day. I think that was all. I called the police and they subsequently sent round a CSI (not Gary Dourdan, unfortunately). He dusted for prints and all that stuff they do, but found nothing. Needless to say, i hardly slept a wink that night as the window was broken and wide open.

The landlord had the window boarded up temporarily whilst he made arrangements for it to be replaced, but the following weekend, i returned home from a wedding, only to find the board bashed in. Once again, they'd come and this time they took all my CDs and DVDs, some electronics and stuff like that. I was livid.

The window was finally replaced, but very soon, the little toe-rags (how do i know they were 'little'? Don't worry. I'll get to that soon) came back, smashed the glass and came in again. This time, they were really starting to take the mickey as they took my mini-stepper, and some new pots and pans (still in the packaging) that had been a birthday present from my Mum!

To cut a long story short, they came back one more time, after which i said 'enough is enough, I'm outta here'! So i got over my fear of living with strangers and found a flat share somewhere in North London.

The landlord found a new tenant who also happened to be a guy who worked shifts. You won't believe that they actually came again, smashed the window and climbed in. Or maybe they didn't. The tale gets a bit murky here. Basically, the man was in and asleep and the noise woke him. Imagine their shock! Turned out they were two boys in their early teens who had figured out that i was never in during the day so they'd decided to just help themselves to my possessions! I can't imagine what they thought they would get on the 5th 'visit'! Unbelievable!!! Thinking back, i can't remember if i took the moral high ground or if i cast some hot ijebu curses their way. Anyway, that's my experience of ghetto living. I was glad to get out, i can tell you that for nothing, but not everyone gets to do that...

Tuesday, 15 April 2008

Butt-bras really do exist!

This is a public service to those of you who couldn't quite get your heads around the concept of *drum roll*...the BUTT-BRA!!!(see here)

Please note that regular responsible blogging service will resume ASAP

Wednesday, 9 April 2008

New English Words and Phrases

Yeah, you guessed it...i have blogstipation! I'm therefore setting a challenge for you all - The person who features as many of these words/phrases as possible in their next post wins a prize...

New English Words and Phrases

1. Multi-dadding pp. Having multiple children with multiple men.
—multi-dad v., n.

Example Citation:
In our part of the world, Lucy Lawless, Sally Ridge and Wendyl Nissen happily navigate their way through multi-dadding arrangements. ...
Women like Anderson say the negative reaction towards multi-fathered families comes from an assumption that multi-dadding women must be promiscuous.
But Anderson is quick to set the record straight, saying she has only had relationships with four men — the fathers of her four children.
—Shelley Bridgeman, "Who's the daddy?," The New Zealand Herald, September 30, 2007

2. Smexting
pp. Sending text messages while standing outside on a smoking break. [Blend of smoking and texting.]
Example Citation:

The smoking ban has had an unusual side effect.
A record number of text messages have been sent by smokers who want to pass the time over a cigarette while banished to outside venues. ...
Experts have now dubbed the phenomenon 'smexting'.
—Mark Prigg, "Smoking ban leads to surge in texting," The Evening Standard, August 7, 2007

3. Butt bra
n. An undergarment that supports the buttocks. Also: buttbra.

Example Citation:
In appearance, the Biniki is similar to the kind of complicated Victorian undergarments you read about in your Brontes class in college. Consisting of two leg loops and a waistband, this foundation garment encircles the buttocks and "lifts and smoothes" the back of the upper thigh (which, when you hit 30, may or may not look like a burlap bag full of doorknobs). This device is often referred to, subtly, as a "butt bra."
—Emma Downs,, "A thing of booty," Fort Wayne Journal-Gazette, March 2, 2006

4. Approximeeting
pp. Getting together with one or more people by first arranging an approximate time or place and then firming up the details later on, usually via cell phone.
—approximeet v.

Example Citations:
Marty Cooper, known as the "father of the cellphone" for his work in developing the first mobile phones at Motorola, recalls that he only became aware of the device's full potential as a result of actually using it. His secretary called him on his prototype mobile phone as he was getting into his car to drive to a meeting to say that it had been cancelled—thus saving him from a wasted journey. But explaining the benefits of being able to change plans on the fly to potential customers was difficult, he says, so the first phones were marketed instead on the basis that they could make people more productive, by allowing them to work while on the move. But today the idea of "approximeeting"—arranging to meet someone without making firm plans about time or place, and then finalising details via mobile phone while out and about—is commonplace.
—"The phone of the future," The Economist, December 2, 2006

5. Generation XL (jen.uh.ray.shun eks.EL) n. Children or young adults who are overweight.

Example Citations:
Internet workers call it "the start-up 15," the extra pounds they gained when they gave up a balanced diet and regular exercise for their dot-com jobs.
"In my case, it's the start-up 24," Phillips said.
Meet Generation XL. Like college freshmen who get fat from too much dorm food and too little activity, many cubicle potatoes lead very unhealthy lives. They have erratic eating habits and indulge in too much late-afternoon or late-night high-fat snacking. They are only half joking when they say their only physical activity is surfing the Internet.
—Jessica Guynn, "As dot-coms trim fat, so do ex-workers," Contra Costa Times, March 19, 2001

6. Nico-teen (NIK.oh.teen) n. A teenager who smokes cigarettes.

Example Citation:
Teenagers are more likely to start smoking if their favourite film stars are smokers.
—Matthew Hart, "Film star smokers blamed for nico-teen addicts," Courier Mail, February 26, 2001

7. Protirement
(proh.TYR.munt) n. Retiring or quitting an unattractive job to pursue work or hobbies more suited to one's personality. Also: pro-tirement.
—protire v.

Example Citations:
Yet, for an increasing number of us, the conversation doesn't end there. More than 80% of 30-to 35-year-old professionals claim they are unhappy at work, worn down by a combination of stress, boredom and "aspiration deficit": the feeling that their job isn't giving back as much as they put into it. As working hours and the pressure to earn big bucks increase, the generation that once thought it could have it all has started to wonder whether it is worth sacrificing life to get it.
"People are starting to have midlife crises as early as 26," says Ann-Marie Woodall, author of Secrets of a High-heeled Healer. "Careers, especially those in areas such as the City and media, have become all about instant gratification. You can get success so quickly, more and more people are tasting it, and then realising that it's not making them happy."
For many, that realisation leaves a straight choice between continuing in a career that pays well but makes them miserable, and doing something less lucrative but more fulfilling — a lifestyle option that has been dubbed "protirement". According to research, one in 15 under-35s is already "protired".
—Anita Chaudhuri, "I want to change my life," The Sunday Times of London, September 21, 2003

8. Skinship
n. Feelings of relatedness and affection between two people, particularly a mother and a child, caused by hugging, touching, and other forms of physical contact.

Example Citation:
Cathedrals of the Flesh, by Alexia Brue (Bloomsbury; $24.95). This entertaining picaresque chronicles the author's mostly naked reconnaissance of the world's public baths, from cavernous marble Turkish hamams and smoky Helsinki saunas to militantly hot Moscow banyas and a New York bathhouse of dubious hygiene. ... Brue's depiction of herself as a bumbling innocent abroad isn't entirely believable, but her approach to other cultures is refreshingly humble, and her devotion to the pleasures of bathing with strangers makes a seductive case for "skinship," in which, naked together in the same water, "you do away with all the normal social barriers in life."
—"The Critics: Briefly Noted," The New Yorker, January 20, 2003

9. Mouse race
(MOWS rays) n. A lower-stress lifestyle that results from moving to a smaller community or taking a less demanding job. —adj.

Example Citations:
Glen and Phyllis Swank were looking to move from southern California two years ago.
"We wanted to leave the rat race and join the mouse race," said Phyllis, who among other jobs worked at a Jewish day school, a private high school, an affordable housing program and as a cake decorator.
Glen, who labored for 25 years as an applications engineer for the world's largest tool manufacturer, said retiring from that job was retirement number one. He is currently in what he calls retirement number two: serving bed and breakfast customers. He is looking forward to a third retirement, when he will actually vacation in bed and breakfasts.
—Tom Wharton, "Mouse Race Pace Suits Them Fine," Salt Lake Tribune, May 3, 2003, Saturday

10. Hurry sickness n. A malaise where a person feels chronically short of time, and so tends to perform every task faster and to get flustered when encountering any kind of delay.

Example Citation:
The microwave oven is one of the modern objects that convey the most elemental feeling of power over the passing seconds. You watch those seconds, after all, as they tick past on the digital display. If you suffer from hurry sickness in its most advanced stages, you may find yourself punching eighty-eight seconds instead of ninety because it is faster to tap the same digit twice.
—James Gleick, Faster, Random House, 1999

11. Salad dodger (SAL.ud daw.jur) n. An overweight person; a person who shuns healthy foods. Also: salad-dodger, SD.

Example Citations:
So, food is a national comforter. Famously too, though the Scots are a nation of salad dodgers. It's a fair cop but, in our defence, have you seen what nature provides in the way of soil? Anything that isn't gorse isn't that easy to grow here. Scotland's stony fields are in fact, particularly suited to growing turnips.
—Jenny Colgan,

"Chips with everything: Ridiculed by gourmets, feared by doctors, and now celebrated by Irvine Welsh, Scottish food has always been an acquired taste," The Guardian (London), August 20, 2003

Sunday, 6 April 2008

Spring time in London

AM (6th April 2008)

PM (6th April 2008)

It hasn't snowed down here in the South in a loooong time. At least not where i live. These are the breath-taking views i woke up to this morning as i left home for Church. It was freezing, but breath-taking all the same. It was also a blink and you'd miss it moment,as when i left Church this afternoon, the snow had completely melted and could almost have never occurred.

I don't like change very much. I deal with it as it happens because it's bound to happen, but that doesn't mean i like or welcome it. That is not too say that i like routine either. Infact, the creative part of me probably hates routine much more than i resent change. So, i'm trying not to grumble and complain as increasingly, the seasons appear to be departing from their established pattern. It's snowing in Spring for goodness sake!

One can draw parallels between the 'mixed-up' seasons and life i.e. things do not always fall in line with expectations or well laid out plans. However, just as the snow that 'shouldn't' have fallen today melted within a few hours, and the known pattern was re-established, i strongly believe that when life throws us curve balls, the balance will ultimately be restored and the Master Plan will be established once again. It may happen within a couple of hours, or sometimes it might take a couple of years, but ultimately, all things work together for our good (Romans 8:28). All we have to do is hold on even against the odds.

But those who wait upon God get fresh strength.
They spread their wings and soar like eagles,
They run and don't get tired,
they walk and don't lag behind (Isaiah 40:31)

Don't overlook the obvious here, friends. With God, one day is as good as a thousand years, a thousand years as a day. God isn't late with his promise as some measure lateness. He is restraining himself on account of you, holding back the End because he doesn't want anyone lost. He's giving everyone space and time to change (2 Peter 3:8)

God bless you all. Have a wonderful week.

Thursday, 3 April 2008

Overheard in Camden (Part 2)

This forms the second post in the Overheard in Camden series. See here for Part 1

I was in the Camden Town branch of Sainsbury's, earlier today, in the biscuit aisle trying to convince myself that i did not actually need two packets of Malted Milk, as one packet was more than enough, given my tendency to binge eat whenever biscuits or chocolate are within my reach. I swear, i take no prisoners. I do not rest until they are all gone! So i very wisely do not usually stock up on such things.

All of a sudden, my reverie is intruded upon by the clip-clopping sound of heels on the marble-esque floor of the supermarket. I deduce that it must be some chic in killer heels tottering around with a shopping basket, doing some quick lunch time shopping. I keep my eyes glued to the biscuits in front of me, but being a shoe fetishist myself, i'm resolved to steal a quick glance when she walks past me.

The footsteps slow down and finally stop somewhere to my right. As previously resolved, i steal a glance, however the only person standing anywhere near me is a short, squat man. I swivel round (i have confessed to blatant nosiness in the first post already). No chic. I hone in on the man once again and wait for him to begin to walk off. He eventually does.

There it is again.





Only in Camden.

Wednesday, 2 April 2008

I'm Ok

Thanks for all the love, people. That was then, this is now. I'm good. I really do appreciate you all. Take...

Tuesday, 1 April 2008

I want to be an Island!