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I have another question. It’s a bit of a sensitive (is that the word? It is in a way that will soon become clearer, I guess. Lol!) area.
To set the scene...I have 2 nieces and nephews – 2 nieces and 1 nephew from Sister 1, and 1 nephew from Sister 2. So far so good, abi? Right, so nephew number 2 lives with my mum (looong story) and he is literally days away from his 9th birthday.
We were at a family function last weekend, when from across the room, I noticed my Mum and Sister 1 having what appeared to be a heated-ish discussion. I wasn’t particularly in the mood to do anything more than mentally note it. Subsequently during the afternoon, Sister 1 steps out into the garden with the children. I eventually follow. She doesn’t look too pleased so I ask her what’s up.
She explains that my mum had asked her to have a conversation about the birds and the bees with Nephew 2. I was like, okayyyyy. So? She was like, she didn’t want to do it. I was like, why? She was like (yes I know there are lots of ‘likes’ in this story. Bear with me) she just didn’t. I was like, what brought up the issue anyway? Had he been asking questions? She said, no my mum had walked in on him that morning, ‘playing with himself’. Ahhhh, I nodded. I seeeee. Basically, she didn’t feel comfortable doing it.
My mum later brought up the topic with me and I asked her why she couldn’t do it herself. She replied shortly ‘
mi o t’omo okunrin ri’, which translates ‘I’ve never brought up a boy before’. Never a truer word spoken. I come from a family of women. The arrival of my two nephews was greeted with much rejoicing....But back to my earlier convo with Sis.
In the process of explaining why she didn’t want to have the conversation, she had mentioned that in her opinion it was a bit early for Nephew 2 to be doing ‘that’. This immediately caused my hackles to rise, as my immediate question was – early, compared to whom or what exactly? I don’t agree with such comparisons at all, because everyone is an individual. What may be the norm for one is not necessarily going to be the norm for another. Of course there are indicators for certain things, but as I’ve said, I do not like comparison. It really annoys me.
So I asked her if she’d had the conversation with Nephew 1 (her son aged 11). She was like, no because he doesn’t do that. I was like, er how do you know? She was like she just did. I was like, no, not good enough. It’s not exactly the kind of thing he would broadcast as in ‘hey mum, guess what I’ve just done…’. She insisted that he was like an open book and her relationship with him was such she would know (maybe by telepathy? Or perhaps Jedi mind trick. Ok, I’ll lay off the sarcasm!..).
So, my questions, just because it’s been on my mind and I have no frame of reference, are:
1. Is 8 going on 9 ‘too early’ to …You Know What?
2. And this one is probably for the men folk…and specifically those who are willing to admit that they ‘indulged’…would you ever in your wildest dreams have considered sharing that kind of information with your mother, no matter how close to her you were?
PS
See
here for answers to the movie quotes quiz. Well done to those who took part. Please rate yourselves :)